By: Jessica Matteson
You’re guilty of it. I’m guilty of it. We’re all guilty of it. We substitute emojis for actual words and use ridiculous acronyms for shorthand. BRBG2GAD (be right back got to grab a dictionary—yes, I made that up). Maybe it’s because we live in the 21st century and we’re prewired to follow trends or do things that supposedly make our lives easier. Or maybe we’re just lazy.
While I admit to using fun emojis to spice up my texts or throwing in an “LOL” when typing “haha” isn’t enough, first and foremost I’m a grammarian. I love the English language and have studied it my entire adult life. I went to school for journalism and chose editing as my specialty when we broke into capstone classes our final year to really learn the nitty-gritty.
Prime numbers and the quadratic equation mean nearly nothing to me, but ask me how to properly punctuate a coordinating conjunction or compound modifier and I’m your gal. This creates a passion for something, even if it’s as mind numbing as grammar. I’m lucky to use my talent every day through my work and live out my passion. I’m a full-time magazine editor and also freelance edit this very magazine you’re holding! One of my favorite things to do is teach friends, family, co-workers and even strangers about grammar and share tips and tricks for clear and precise writing.
The most common excuse I hear involves spell check or autocorrect. “Why do I need to learn to spell if my computer and phone fix my mistakes?” Have you ever tried to type a word so many times and spell check just gives up? It has no idea what you’re trying to spell. You even lose faith that the word you’re trying to spell is an actual word. Technology won’t always be a reliable source for fixing your mistakes. Plus, good grammar is just cool.
It’s especially important to be professional when writing in the workplace. The average office worker sends or receives more than 100 emails per day. With all those words zipping through cyberspace, it’s easy to slip up and mistake a “your” for “you’re.” But if you take a moment to slow down and carefully type out what you want to get across, you are less likely to send typos to co-workers. Small-business owners, especially, should carefully proofread their social media pages and personal website for errors if they cannot hire someone to do it for them.
Let’s go over a few tips and tricks to polish up your writing! The first thing is spacing. Before desktops and laptops and the keyboards we’re all used to became ubiquitous, we typed on typewriters. A typewriter’s default is a monotype font, meaning each letter takes up the same amount of space regardless of width. It was necessary to use two spaces after a period to distinguish a new sentence. Once the modern computer came around, text documents magically gave us proportional fonts and fixed the issue of legibility between words and new sentences. Thus, the grammarians of the world decided to cut the double space between sentences down to just one. Yes, I know. It’s a hard habit to break. But you’ll save space, and your writing will look cleaner.
Another common error I come across is mixing up similar words, such as “farther” versus “further” or “insure” versus “ensure.” We’ll start with the first example. “Farther” is a comparative adverb. It describes when something is, literally, more far. An example: “I don’t think I can run any farther.” Its similar-sounding word friend is “further,” which is a verb when used with an object. It progresses the development of something. An example: “Can you explain your reasoning further?” Although the two words sound similar and are often used interchangeably, they actually mean two different things. Just remember that if you are talking about an actual distance, use the word “farther.” If you are talking about an idea or something hypothetical, use “further.”
The second example I mentioned is “insure” versus “ensure.” The word “insure” describes insurance, whether it is actual car/home/life insurance or even just the idea of keeping something protected. An example: “I need to insure my car.” The word “ensure,” on the other hand, is to make certain that something happens. An example: “Please ensure that this gets back to its owner.” Again, it’s just about taking the time to stop and make sure you are using precisely the word you intend.
“I could care less!” I bet you’ve said that one a time or two. Sometimes even I catch myself saying that common-yet-incorrect phrase. If you could care less, that means you do in fact care. You probably mean that you couldn’t care less. It’s a silly mistake, but it’s an easy fix to work into our everyday language.
Apostrophes are always confusing, so let’s break down this tricky problem. What do you do with apostrophes when there are two people owning something? It’s easy to remember that if the two people own the same thing, you only use an apostrophe on the last person’s name. If the two people own two different things, use an apostrophe on both names. An example: “Let’s take Al and Mary’s car.” This means that Al and Mary share the same car. An example: “What should we do for Al’s and Mary’s birthdays?” This means Al and Mary have separate birthdays. They might in fact be born on the same day, but they each have their own birthday.
I hope you’ve learned a thing or two and that these lessons come in handy next time you craft an important email or piece of writing. I know grammar can be confusing, especially when rules always seem to contradict themselves. My favorite grammar joke? “I before E except after C. Weird.” But fine-tuning your grammar can also be a fun way to connect with a language you thought you already knew everything about. It can also help you learn other languages and realize that although we speak different languages, we aren’t all that different.
Jessica Matteson is a graduate of the University of Missouri, with degrees in journalism and multicultural studies, and also received her post-graduate certificate at the University of California Los Angeles in screenwriting. She currently lives in San Diego, California, and works as an editor for a large magazine publishing company, as well as edits for Focus on Fabulous magazine. In her spare time, she loves to travel and spend time with her friends and family, especially her nephew Jonah and dog Remington. Jessica is available for freelance editing work and can be reached on LinkedIn.