I recently heard an analogy about a fire poker. You know that long pointy thing with the handle that you use to maneuver hot embers around a fire? The analogy was that people are much like that fire poker. When placed in its stand it is the temperature of its surroundings, usually cool and touchable. As such when left in the fire long enough it gets hotter and hotter and can become as red and dangerous as the embers in which it mingles among. Much like the fire poker, we tend to adapt to our environment.

Has anyone ever told you, “show me your friends and I’ll show you your future?” If your mother was like mine you probably heard similar things like “birds of a feather flock together,” or “you become who you hang out with,” or what about, “If you hang out with chickens you’re going to peck but if you hang out with eagles, you’re going to soar.” Even lately I’ve learned that apparently, we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with.

I make it a mission every day to work on being a better person than the day before. Were you aware that the fastest way to learn, grow and change yourself, your attitude or your mood is to hang out with people who are already where you want to be? It’s true.  If you want to be smarter, hang out with smart people. If you are fighting moodiness and depression you don’t want to hang around with moody and depressed people. If you want to learn something new surround yourself with experts in that area.

In truth, if you become who you hang out with then hang out with loving, kind, encouraging, brilliant, passionate, alive, caring and giving people.  Mark Twain said it best when he wrote, “Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you too, can become great. When you are seeking to bring big plans to fruition, it is important with whom you regularly associate. Hang out with friends who are like-minded and who are also designing purpose-filled lives. Similarly, be that kind of friend to your friends.”

Girl, it’s time to focus on the sparkle or in this case, the fire. Because you really cannot hang out with negative people and expect to live a positive life. Choose today to surround yourself with positive people. Get close to the fire, feel the heat! Find the people who fire you up. Their heat in the form of passion and energy will help you grow no matter what you endure.